I had a busy day yesterday. Meetings all morning into the afternoon left little time to get things done in the lab that I needed to finish. It all was a blur. By the time I got home in the afternoon, I was ready for a nap. Instead, I drove up to the local spot EL and I used to go and got a spa mani/pedi. The folks in there always remember me from her and ask how I am when I go in for service. I was caught off guard this time when one of the girls asked me if I'd started dating again. I said no as I digested the question. It is a thought so uncomfortable to me that I have trouble verbalizing the whirlwind in my mind on the subject. I am a very emotional, sentimental, and romantic guy that is completely worthless without a woman in his life. Statistically speaking, the best parts of me come alive when I have someone with whom to direct my affection. I just can't draw a line... straight, squiggly, or otherwise... from where I am right now to where I could be in a relationship with someone besides my wife. I am quite certain that I could be in a physical relationship and if I could get past the emotional disconnect it would likely be healthy for my overactive libido. I can't seem to sort it out. How unfair could that be for a woman to know second place would always have to be good enough? Unacceptably unfair in my opinion. Anyway, I'm just thinking out loud. The point I was trying to get around to is that the manicurist really sucker punched me with that question and it started me thinking about just how broken I am. That's all. On another note, I got my eyebrows waxed while I at it. I feel sorry for all the blokes out there too insecure to get some periodic maintenance at a spa/salon. Contrary to Appendix A of the NASCAR handbook, your penis will not fall off and another end up in your mouth if you partake this sort of housecleaning. The rain here continues on and off throughout each day. I'd rather it storm and be over than this dreary drizzle. I'm hoping my mother and step-dad come up to my place early (meaning tonight) so we can grill out and spend some time visiting before I leave on Thursday. I need to get back in the lab... ciao.
Hey, no making fun of NASCAR fans!!! LOL Girls love guys who don’t mind doing what they need to to look their best. (My son just got his eyebrows waxed for the first time the other day. He screamed like a girl!!!)
Ok, so I love Evanesence. That song always makes me feel like crying, and her voice is SO haunting!
I can only imagine how impossible it must seem to think of being in a relationship, but honestly I think that once you open your self up to even just a physical relationship you are starting to allow yourself to LIVE again and maybe it just “happens.”
I think the people in your life that care about you probably hope that, in time, you find someone to share your life again. Someone who can allow you to still feel the way you do about EL and knows that you can seperate the two. At least that’s how I feel about my brother. His fiance died just over two years ago and he’s finally SERIOUS with another girl… but he’s still very emotional when we mention Cheryl.
Ooh, it seems a bit early to be dating, in my opinion, but I can’t imagine you’d find it too difficult to find a girl willing to put up with second place - for a while at any rate. :-)
exactly.
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