The darker side of humanity.
Ironically, it won't stop raining outside much like in my heart. The streets are flooding. The ground is saturated and the drainage ditches look like raging rivers with white water rapids ready to brave. My day was filled with troubleshooting a problem out at a client site. Time passed quickly and I had little time to think about my situation. By late afternoon, I was back at my home office fielding phone calls from colleagues. More time passes. I see her photo and hear her in my mind, but it sounds distant as I find myself ending the day. It is like I pushed it all away for a brief period without meaning to do so... I felt guilty and sad. Guilty because she deserves to be much more than a memory in my life and sad because I had to find her at the end of my day. I'm not saying she was completely out of mind, but rather remembered in passing as if she was waiting for me at home and all was well. It wasn't until I started to end my day that the gravity of reality was set back in motion. Even still, I persisted. I wanted to run a quick errand in The Woodlands and needed some company so I called Sam to offer. I think it was around 8:15 or so when I got the call. A reporter from a local newspaper wanted to ask me some questions about Erin and encouraged a statement about what type of woman she was for the "curious". I was in complete shock. I was trembling with disbelief and waves of grief were washing over me. What furthered my confusion and awe was that I've been patiently waiting to be contacted (as promised) regarding the finalization of all paperwork associated with her accident investigation. The processes of which has held up my ability to gather her personal effects present at the time of the accident... which I still do not have to this moment. Paperwork the reporter claimed to have copies of in hand. How could a newspaper have access to paperwork before I was even made aware it was filed? How did they have my cell phone number? What sort of person can cross that boundary to turn a tragic and incredibly painful life-changing event into trivial reporting? I was devastated. I called the detective "handling" the case and left voicemail. Still in shock, I followed up with an email. I felt feel helpless. This is the world in which we exist. This is the world we leave to our children. Sorrowful.
Sometimes you have to wonder about reporters. I know it’s their job, but at the same time, it just seems insensitive. For the curious? A quick news story for them, a loss of a loved one to us.
I remember when my Grandmother’s house caught fire and my mom, my aunt and I raced over only to find out she’d passed away in the fire. I’d been allowed to enter the home, with a firefighter clamping down on my arm, to identify “the body”. While we were waiting in their tenants home for “the body” to be removed, there was a knock on the door. I opened it to find a reporter and a news camera pointed at my face, asking about the fire, whether anyone was inside, etc. I refused comment and closed the door.
I agree, Clayton. Our world is full of rude, self-centered people. People who only focus on ways to get more, have more, make more, no matter the cost or who they hurt. It’s unfortunate that giving, loving people have to be taken from us, while others are allowed to remain. It makes me sad.
If I’m lucky enough to see you in September, I’ll teach you about a little thing called a paragraph tag.
>:o) Sorry to sound glib, because this insult to injury business you speak of is officially The Suck.
I’ve just spent nearly two days railing on about the injustices of life and I’ve got nothing. I’m glad you are still one-footing it into the horizon. Hugs.
I am still IRATE at that call. I had the passing thought of losing it and taking the phone from you and giving her a piece of my mind. That reporter - at the very least - needs some people skills.
Gawd… how awful. That’s all I can think of to say. I’m sorry.
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