this page intentionally left blank

I can’t sleep… or can I? I’ve not tried. I’m not tired and nothing seems to fill the time with any sort of satisfaction. I’m lonely with no one to talk to or hold, but isn’t that cliché? I just finished watching Permanent Midnight via channel surfing and I have to say, I felt an emotional sorrow for Jerry Stahl not unlike that I felt for not Bob Barnes, but America while watching Syriana. Oh, and I still find Elizabeth Hurley extremely attractive for whatever reason… but not in an Adriana Lima/Megan Fox sorta way if you can follow that at all. What was I saying? Ah yes… I’ve always been overtly emotional when it comes to being a man. I’m no lumberjack that finishes the day after an unexpected femur break due to a shift in treefall. I cry during movies, at weddings, during the national anthem when I see the American flag flying… you know, that sort of sappy shit. Not tonight however, I think I was too buzzed an annoyed to find something worth investing in on television. Not that I wanted to get into some sort of developmental trend re: movie styles and whatnot, but I am still, to this moment, fascinated with the cult following of horror films… and I use the word ”horror” extremely loosely. I caught a few minutes of The Devil’s Rejects tonight while trying to settle on something to kill the time and [insert eye roll here] umm… ooookay. I am restless. It’s late and I have all sorts of things to say, but no way of remembering them at this particular juncture. I took my new tat idea to the tattoo parlor this evening to consult the inkers and get feedback. It was beyond their technical prowess and I either need to a) change the layout or b) find higher tech artists. I’m opting for option 2. I found some of the coolest toys online tonight… green lasers that will light matches, burn wood, pop balloons, cut plastic and tape, and all sorts of other virtually useless but utterly cool geeky shit. Wicked Lasers come in a variety of flavors (red, green, blue, etc.) and power outputs up to 300mW. If I didn’t just buy a cars worth of camera shit, I would feel the need to appropriate one of these little gems. May the force be with you.

ps. the slang urban dictionary yields the following definition for “american flag”: when a chick sucks your dick, however, she only sucks the head and for quite some time. this leads to a red head, a white shaft, and blue balls… for example: ”Susan soon realized that giving an american flag to her boyfriend would result in a brutal blow to her face.”

You really should learn something every day.