I’m up and down with
I'm up and down with sports. Anyone that knows me knows that I am only a sports enthusiast in the 3D world. I could give two squirts of piss about anything on television. I have a buddy that's a closet sports freak... f-r-e-a-k. Take the person in your life that is the most into sports and mathematically square their enthusiasm... then give them crack cocaine and season tickets to every event in the United States. Kurt is what being a sports fan is all about. He used to announce. I think he ate lead paint chips or something the predicated his decision to move into technology because he is denying his talent for the sake of moving packets around for people in white shirts and ties. Every time there is some impressive sporting moment he writes his thoughts down and SPAM's all his buds with them... I'd like to share some of his commentary with you over last nights game:
"Last night, America was blessed with a bit of sports history. For those of you who witnessed it, you'll probably never forget it. The Houston Astros went into Yankee Stadium this week for their first ever series against the pinstripes in the Bronx. They won last night. They won their first regular season game against the historic franchise that has seen the likes of Babe Ruth, Mickey Mantle, Joe DiMaggio, Lou Gehrig, and other greats that are immortalized forever into baseball history as some of the greatest that have ever played the game. It was a surreal moment for some of the Houston players, who come from the region as young players to visit this ballyard for their first time as professionals, and walk along the same chalk lines in the footsteps of their childhood heroes. For them, it was a culmination of endless dreams. To actually win their first game in Yankee stadium in this fashion couldn't have been expected in anyone's wildest dreams.
The win wasn't just any ordinary win. The Astros won the game 8-0 and pitched a no-hitter one day after losing the night before in a contest frought with unlucky bounces that ended up a Yankee victory. The no-hitter wasn't just any other no-hitter, either. The starting pitcher left the game early in the 2nd inning from a recurring injury. Houston Astros manager Jimy Williams then sent 5 other pitchers over the remaining 8 innings of the game to keep the Yankees hitless and secure the most improbable pitching performance Major League Baseball has ever seen in over 100 years of it's existence. Six pitchers. Nine innings. No runs. No hits. History.
Roy Oswalt. Pere Munro. Kirk Sarloos. Brad Lidge. Octavio Dotel. And closer Billy Wagner. The previous record for a no-hitter shared by multiple pitchers was four hurlers achieving the feat in a game on two occasions. The last time the Yankees were no-hit ? Try September 20, 1958 pitched by Hall of Fame knuckleballer Hoyt Wilhelm of the Baltimore Orioles. The last time they were left hitless in Yankee Stadium was on August 25, 1952, by Detroit's Virgil Tucks.
What was truly amazing was watching the Yankee fans stand and cheer for Astros closer Billy Wagner in the 9th inning try to close it out. Afterwards, someone from the Yankee's organization placed a bottle of champagne outside each of the lockers of the six Astros pitchers in the visitor's clubhouse. That was truly a class act.
Now it's no secret about the feelings I have for the Yankee team, and it's management's incessant drive to win championships by gobbling up all the high-priced talent they can, given the unbalanced monetary rules of the game today. I've blasted about them many a time, mostly in jest, but have always hoped for a more equitable system to save baseball from itself - a financial disaster in the making. But I have to give credit where credit is due. The Yankees, in this horrible loss, showed to me why they are held as the class act of their respective sport last night, and why so many people like myself stay driven to see them fall. They are great, and they recognize greatness when they see it. Success comes in many forms, and even during last night's loss the Yankees won in the hearts of true baseball fans, without even scoring a run on the field."
If I don't see his ass behind a desk with ESPN in the corner of his paycheck soon, I'll be gravely disappointed. He is in denial.
"Last night, America was blessed with a bit of sports history. For those of you who witnessed it, you'll probably never forget it. The Houston Astros went into Yankee Stadium this week for their first ever series against the pinstripes in the Bronx. They won last night. They won their first regular season game against the historic franchise that has seen the likes of Babe Ruth, Mickey Mantle, Joe DiMaggio, Lou Gehrig, and other greats that are immortalized forever into baseball history as some of the greatest that have ever played the game. It was a surreal moment for some of the Houston players, who come from the region as young players to visit this ballyard for their first time as professionals, and walk along the same chalk lines in the footsteps of their childhood heroes. For them, it was a culmination of endless dreams. To actually win their first game in Yankee stadium in this fashion couldn't have been expected in anyone's wildest dreams.
The win wasn't just any ordinary win. The Astros won the game 8-0 and pitched a no-hitter one day after losing the night before in a contest frought with unlucky bounces that ended up a Yankee victory. The no-hitter wasn't just any other no-hitter, either. The starting pitcher left the game early in the 2nd inning from a recurring injury. Houston Astros manager Jimy Williams then sent 5 other pitchers over the remaining 8 innings of the game to keep the Yankees hitless and secure the most improbable pitching performance Major League Baseball has ever seen in over 100 years of it's existence. Six pitchers. Nine innings. No runs. No hits. History.
Roy Oswalt. Pere Munro. Kirk Sarloos. Brad Lidge. Octavio Dotel. And closer Billy Wagner. The previous record for a no-hitter shared by multiple pitchers was four hurlers achieving the feat in a game on two occasions. The last time the Yankees were no-hit ? Try September 20, 1958 pitched by Hall of Fame knuckleballer Hoyt Wilhelm of the Baltimore Orioles. The last time they were left hitless in Yankee Stadium was on August 25, 1952, by Detroit's Virgil Tucks.
What was truly amazing was watching the Yankee fans stand and cheer for Astros closer Billy Wagner in the 9th inning try to close it out. Afterwards, someone from the Yankee's organization placed a bottle of champagne outside each of the lockers of the six Astros pitchers in the visitor's clubhouse. That was truly a class act.
Now it's no secret about the feelings I have for the Yankee team, and it's management's incessant drive to win championships by gobbling up all the high-priced talent they can, given the unbalanced monetary rules of the game today. I've blasted about them many a time, mostly in jest, but have always hoped for a more equitable system to save baseball from itself - a financial disaster in the making. But I have to give credit where credit is due. The Yankees, in this horrible loss, showed to me why they are held as the class act of their respective sport last night, and why so many people like myself stay driven to see them fall. They are great, and they recognize greatness when they see it. Success comes in many forms, and even during last night's loss the Yankees won in the hearts of true baseball fans, without even scoring a run on the field."
If I don't see his ass behind a desk with ESPN in the corner of his paycheck soon, I'll be gravely disappointed. He is in denial.
I agree. He definitely crafts his words well. I could envision someone on the Sports Reporters saying something like this. Give him a good kick in the ass and tell him to get to Bristol.
I LOVE THAT. I love it even more because I hate the Yankees so much. Hahahahahah I could just laugh at them for hours. Go Red Sox.
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