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I'd like mornings better if they started later.

I just watched Orange County with Camron. I have a non-sexual crush on Jack Black, so that was at least one redeeming point for the film. Otherwise it was... well, eeh. I do want to point out the absolutely unrealistic portrayal of the main character's girlfriend. The whole loving/supportive/caring bit just is total rubbish. That shit doesn't exist in the real world. Before that, we watched Smallville. No comment. I got a call from Audra and gang about coming out for some socializing at Front Porch Pub, but I am really beat and have to be at the effin airport way too early tomorrow. So I let Cam pick the wine. I open, pour... she doesn't like it. I drink the bottle. It was delicious. Sleepytime.

"The difference between pornography and erotica is lighting." - Gloria Leonard

Peter: Shit, we should be so lucky. Do you know that they have conjugal visits there?
Samir: Really?
Peter: Yes.
Michael: Shit, I'm a free man and I haven't had a conjugal visit in six months.

Eclair is in heat. Little spots on the kitchen tile gave her away. Poor baby... I always try to be really sensitive to how crummy she probably feels. She gets extra love and attention when she wants, but it's hard for me to keep everything clean. Mop the kitchen, steam the carpets, etc. It's an ongoing effort. I tried to get her pads once... basically, it's a little doggy diaper that you can put a canine maxi-pad in to handle the discharge (what a vivid word that becomes in this context... sorry), but she kept taking them off. I don't know if she was uncomfortable in them physically or just felt really self conscious because she looked ridiculous wearing a diaper. Either way, that doesn't work. I can't leave her outside alone for a long time because she gets really lonely. We'll just wait it out. She's so sweet. Maybe I'll go get her some special doggie treats tonight. Camron went to the movie store. I think tonight may be a quiet night in... especially since I have to be at the airport tomorrow morning at 7:00. At least it's a corp Lear or Gulfstream so I don't have to fight the ticketing and check-in issues. I was really irritated when I got home for some reason. I rarely mad... ever, but for some reason, I felt like it would take nothing but a wrong look or a word spoken just so and I would snap. I really don't know why. Maybe I was tired. Maybe work today (which was busy) made me weary and I needed space. Maybe I am sexually frustrated and am in denial. Maybe I am a ninja and need to flip out but was afraid that I would kill everyone. Maybe I need a hot bath and a few glasses of merlot. Yeah... that's probably it.

"Spring Buds" - Michael Hedges
On the last naked day of winter
On the eve of a fateful thaw
I was imprisoned in frozen pieces
Of heart-broken laws

Then down fell an angel renegade
Her halo read "Morning Star"
Wounded by the doom of a comet tail
She was sealed with a scar

Then a sweet lightning struck
And the earth opened us
Like spring buds

Why she ever fled heaven
And why I would hibernate
Answers why we would meet here
To equal our altered states

With a sacred heart-shared rhythm
We blossom through the spring
Star of the Morning shines now
On her own two wings
______________

I am feelin' bootylicious. Don't touch me. I think Sean and I are going to do some techno/dance mixes and cut an EP after X is done this year. I think we have similar opinions on what constitutes good audio engineering in house music. Random thought. It just popped in there... I'm kookie like that...

"I'm receiving a serious bitch vibe here." - the Stranger (Cold Call)
My flight is at effin 7:30 tomorrow. I am going to cut out of here early on principle. I am sleepy. I need to go back to the gym on a regular basis to kick start my metabolism. I feel lethargic these days. I had lunch with Min, Dwayne, Ben, and Bob... the one syllable gang (Joe was out sick). Being the only two syllable guy there, I was the fifth wheel. Gawd, I'm so easily amused. Anyhoo, Min just got his US citizenship last week, so this was a little congratulatory meal. "Welcome to American citizenship, here... eat this crap." It was terrible... worst Chinese food in downtown Houston. I just finished watching Cold Call. Back in 1999, Sean and Tim made this excellent short. It was their first genuine effort at independent film and the actors were not really much more than some friends of theirs... the acting was tres crummy, but the cinematography and the storyline (all created by Tim and Sean) was excellent. I am not going to post a link to Cold Call here because I haven't asked Sean's permission however, it's worth a watch if you ever have the opportunity. Maybe if you send Sean lots of nekkid pictures and Penthouse Forum style emails about what a sexy man he is, he may authorize it's viewing. If he still says no, send them all to me and I'll trade you a bootleg. (kidding dood)

BLOODY HELL! I missed trash day again. Snoozed the alarm clock, too late to ride. Joe is calling in sick, no carpool backout plan. METRO sucks. I'm running late. I need a vacation. Coffee will cure this... I believe it to be so...

Great night. Had dinner with Camron... ran into old friends. I also ran into someone special. That's all I am going to say about that... it's getting late. I think I'll sleep.

This work day is finally over.

"Please Don't Tell Her" - Big Head Todd and the Monsters
I always leave her waiting
I always leave her down
If she should come my way
I always turn around,
Please don't tell her I love her.

I always keep her out
I never let her in
If she should come my way weeping
I greet her with a grin
Please don't tell her I love her.

If she should discover the colors of my love,
She will fly, fly away

Now you can try tenderness,
You can try to hang around,
Oh, but I'm sure she'll love you less,
I'm sure she'll bring you down.
Please don't tell her I love her
______________

I had hummus w/pita and cilantro potatoes for lunch... Veggiesaurus style. I am not feeling myself. It must just be a Monday thing. I really dislike Mondays. Camron called asking about plans for tonight. I said nothing. I know that by the time the proverbial whistle blows, I'll be pumped up on the just-off-work euphoria and will want to paint the town red (yes, Sean... on a Monday) however, I am currently only thinking of my soft cotton sheets and a big, fluffy comforter hidden under a mountain of oversized pillows. I talked to Jason just before lunch. I may not be able to make it to Los Angeles after all this month. I had planned on going out there in a couple of weeks for a visit, but things are hectic here at work and with Camron's visit, the logistics of my original itinerary are skewed. I need to run away. I just found out that Bob (another guy I work with) is heading to the Cayman Islands next week for fun in the sun. Maybe I'll just become a hermit. I have a lot of work to do... I can't wait to get out of here today.

Monday. Bleeeeh!

Beef jerky is the best road trip snack known to Meatasauruses. No question.

My state of my mind has been anything but lucid the last three days. I needed the sleep I managed to steal last night and I feel, even still, that it was not quite enough. I have mixed feelings about Camron's visit. I love her very much and I don't get to see her often, but having grown up with her and having a history of the stereotypical relationship of two siblings of the opposite sex, we tend to be ok together in small doses, but over time that harmony deteriorates into subtle irritated remarks and poor communication. I tell her she is welcome to stay as long as she likes, but in reality I know that I can only deal with a finite visit. We fought a lot as children. She was always jealous of my independence while our mother kept her so protected. As an adult, I tried to bring us closer together and help her find her maturity by providing her my home in Virginia Beach (rent free and bill free) while I was out of the country for a while. I thought that putting her 1600 miles from "home" and removing the stress of living expenses would give her room to grow and to prove to our mother that she was no longer a little girl. It seems that will never change no matter what she says or does, so now I just provide a safe haven for her when she needs to put some distance between her and her everyday life. She's 26 and has direction. She just needs a chance to prove herself. I can't stop yawning. I think I'll walk across the street for a double espresso.

It's a beautiful night... really. (4.0MB)